See this is exactly what I’m talking about. We wake up this morning at 4:45 am to find our 17-yr old son gone. Missing. His bedroom door locked. He’s snuck out his bedroom window AGAIN. My narc gets all upset, does his usual huffing and puffing but never really does anything about it. No consequences, no grounding, not taking anything away, like his games or his cell phone, no nothing.
For the last 5 years, I have been telling my narc our son is going down the wrong path. I have said it, his teachers have all said it, his principles have said, his high school coaches have said it and even a psychiatrist that I took him to said it, and my narc still refused to listen. Anyway, I have been nagging or whatever you want to call it, at him to listen to me about our son and that I felt that the lack of his “parental” disciplinary actions (because he never listens to me, he discards me) was going to come back and bite us in the ass, my narc ignores me like usual. And every time I beg and plead for him to just listen to me and stop doubting me when it comes to our son not being able to be trusted, he always says “You’re always trying to blame me for something” word for word, this what he says.
NARCS NEVER WANT TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANYTHING!!! If he had Just nipped our son’s behavior in the bud a long time ago and just listen to me maybe our son wouldn’t be such a stubborn undisciplined teen who thinks he can come and go as he pleases, control his father (oh hail no is he not going to try that shit with me), invite girls over our house and in his room with the door closed and lights out while his father sits right there and accepts it, etc, etc this list goes on and on. My point is although we are not supposed to blame people for stuff, HE IS TO BLAME!! my narc is an enabler who would rather be a best friend to his son rather than the father that he needs. I’m so pissed right now!! Now look at our son. No goals for college, no wanting to get up and do anything for himself, not trying in high school, grades failing even though I’ve begged him to let me help…I HAVE NO ONE ELSE TO BLAME BUT MY NARC. Sorry yall, but I had to vent….